Taxi!!!

[pete 2,499]

The tims were hogging the limelight in the press last week. First there was wee Gordy saying he would like to have Davie Weir in his team. Or maybe he didn�t say it maybe he said he wanted to be wee�r. Nah I don�t think that was it. It is funny how the media always seem to be misquoting him. You could in fact say it is very WeirD.

Big Artur Boruc came out saying he would buy out his contract if he didn�t get 25.000 pound a week. I�ll bet he nearly broke his fingers crossing himself when he thought that one up. That is a hell of a lot of money per blunder. On Saturday he blundered again coming for a cross he did not get near. As wee Gordy would say �The referee should book him for wasting time every time he comes for a cross.

Gordy then hit out and called the press serial killers. That is a cracker from a chucky look alike. He has been murdering us for years with his patter.

Everyone seems to be calling Scott McDonald, Skippy these day�s but he can never emulate the real Skippy, because he would have died for the rangers. Willie Wombat would be a better nickname as they are short legged and muscular.

After the AC Milan game Celtic fans have a new code of honour . Yes your honour, no your honour. Robert McHendry, has been handed 120 hours community service. Well at least that will be one Celtic supporter with a job.

Davy Irons blasted the SPL for making Gretna build a 6000 seat stadium. He does have a point but trying to fit a football field in a stadium to hold 100 supporters would be a bigger problem.

 

SCOTS football fans are set to down FIVE MILLION pints of beer watching the game against Italy. Is Gribz going tee total then.

 

Taxi!!!

 

Here are a few Strachan moments.

 

Gordon Strachan on Wayne Rooney : Its an incredible rise to stardom, at 17 you�re more likely to get a call from Michael Jackson than Sven Goran Eriksson.

Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the England squad? Strachan: I dont care, I�m Scottish

 

Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?

Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, "No, I think they should have got George Graham because I'm useless."

 

Reporter: Is that your best start to a season?

Strachan: Well I've still got a job so it's far better than the Coventry one, that's for sure.

 

Reporter: Are you getting where you want to be with this team?

Strachan: We're not doing bad. What do you expect us to be like? We were eighth in the league last year, in the cup final and we got into Europe. I don't know where you expect me to get to. Do you expect us to win the Champions League?

 

Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?

Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.

 

Strachan: I've got more important things to think about. I've got a yogurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today. That can be my priority rather than Agustin Delgado.

 

Reporter: This might sound like a daft question, but you'll be happy to get your first win under your belt, won't you?

Strachan: You're right. It is a daft question. I'm not even going to bother answering that one. It is a daft question, you're spot on there.

 

Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?

Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become an alcoholic and maybe jump off a bridge. Umm, I think I can take it, yeah.

 

Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?

Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here. I'm going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down negative man, down.

 

Reporter: Where will Marion Pahars fit into the team line-up?

Strachan: Not telling you! It's a secret.

 

Reporter: You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?

Strachan: I don't take stupid comments lightly either.

 

Reporter: So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were better than you today?

Strachan: What areas? Mainly that big green one out there...

 

Strachan was on Sky on Sunday morning. He saw John Terry's goal and said he was impressed that Terry goes up expecting to score. He contrasted this to Claus Lundekvam the Saints central defender who goes up for every dead ball and never ever looks remotely like scoring. He said if there was a dead body lying in the penalty area the ball would hit it on the head several times a season which he said is more than Lundekvam can manage. He said referees should book Lundekvam for timewasting every time he goes up for a corner. When the co-commentator said if Lundekvam was watching Strachan was only joking. Strachan assured him he was deadly serious.