26th of foot

Candid reporting, James Joseph Doherty has been stripped of the usual title, ‘football fan’, he is described as, “a man”. Maybe, in a decade, Editors and Subbies will allow reporters to utilise titles such as, ‘Sellik fan’? Of course, James Joseph Doherty will be due a year’s counselling, I note the report states he is from Londonderry; traumatising! It will be interesting, if you remember, a Caledonian Uni’ undergraduate turned up at a Halowean party dressed as Postman Pat, carrying a parcel bomb addressed to Neil Lennon? He was charged, tried, convicted, and sentenced to a six month custodial sentence, suspended. Such a precedent might be awkward for James a Joseph Doherty? I am sure it won’ t be.

Sweet Thursday. I don’t know, does John Steinbeck still hold sway? He wrote what he knew, the Monterey peninsula was the every time setting. Political commentary such as ‘the Grapes of Wrath’ competed with pot boiling page turners, ‘East of Eden’, room had to be found for regular morality tales, ‘Of Mice and Men’, and relief was found in, ‘Canary Row’ and, ‘Sweet Thursday’. Steinbeck was an everyday reading type of Author. I have long loved the cannon, twenty-five years ago I dragged the wife to California for a month, to pay homage. Standing on a corner of downtown Gilroy, as an open backed truck full of garlic passed wafting a thermal wave, is a real test of eye-watering love of literature. Sweet Thursday is a tale of what’s important in life, the noise and light being created by the community whore house, store, restaurant, bar, ....... etc are the essentials of our eponymous hero, Doc’s existence. His very being, a Marine Biologist relies on the camaraderie, the contentment, the honesty of prostitution, the nostalgia, the superficial take on his community; it is his most particular eco-system. As unique as any other garden inhabited by an octopus. The PQ Gang Hut is a culture, as vibrant as any other smear in a petrie dish. The bombastic camaraderie on display reinforces the mental imagery demanded by radio. Scotland has two clubs left in European competition, Rangers and Sellik are vying for Europa Cup group stage qualification. Big Dick introduces the Blarney Bhoys, Willie Miller, James McFadden, and Billy Dodds at six O’Clock. The discussion on ra hooped horrors visit to Sarajevo lasted 35 minutes. Like Steinbeck and Monterey, this is familiar. Pat and Tom take us through the individual players, the sections of the team, the managements style of play, .... etc. Everyone contributes, everyone wants to he heard contributing, it’s hopeful, the Scots banner is being carried. Now, ra Sellik game kicks off at seven, so 25 minutes left for Rangers discussion? Well, there’s European tour golf being played in North Berwick. Brian McLauchlin reports for five minutes and mentions Paul Lawrie will probably sign off after this event. Cue Big Dick, Liam McLeod, and Willie Miller telling us all again how much a Dandy Don is our Paul. Tom and Pat contribute too, then camaraderie of that day’s golfing foursome is recalled in warm nostalgia. It begins with Tom, “ah hear Ireland won again”? Another five minutes disappears as Big Dick debates with the Blarney Bhoys, the nationality of their Producer, Frank. Paired with Pat, the Newton Mortgage broth of a Bhoy assures the listeners that Frank’s in-laws are all good Donegal stock. As bonding exercises go, the weekly golfing foursome must be the envy of all BBC Radio Scotland listeners? Those of us, and and I suspect we might be the majority, relegated to standing on the sidelines, raging and beefing; when is the Rangers preview? Finally, at a quarter to seven, Big Dick turned to Billy Dodds and for the next five minutes we endured an interrupted discourse of platitudes. Players not discussed, side not broken into departments, and our manager’s style of play might have been ....... well, anything ..... because Billy was cut off as Liam McLeod began his live pitch side interview with Neil Lennon. I understand Liam was inside PQ and Neil was standing in Sarajevo on a hot, sunny afternoon - where the hell is Gabriel Princeps when you need him? Rangers do not have a hand on that Scots standard, we don’ t participate in the golf foursome, we are not worthy of 35 minutes of discussion, our manager is not interviewed, Billy Dodds willingly sits on the naughty step and provides very occasional up dates from Rangers TV, ........ etc. Steinbeck knew a narrative had to contain honesty, the fact the only honesty available in Cannery Row came from the whores, meant that the fabric could not hold without their essential weave. At what point do the Gang Hut acknowledge this essential truth?

Rangers 4 Ross County 0 FGS : Morelos.

I will have have a fair bit to say on PQ’s latest bleating today, the appearance of Doncaster, Mulraney, and Michael Stewart was a given stage to take over from Holicom. However, the latest desire by Cosgrove and Cowan to ensure the Rectum of Dundee(elected unopposed) remains quite important cannot proceed without remark. Today’s Limerick first line was, ‘ Jim Spence was a bit of a flitter’, and it was put out to the listeners? No surprise that the announced winner constructed the following : Jim Spence was a bit of a flitter, In a row he was never a quitter, He astounded the nation, When he said liquidation, Means your club has gone down the shitter. Jum has Tweeted he will frame the winning verse. As of yesterday, Dundee Uni’ had announced three accommodation halls/residences had declared quarantine because of Covid. Jum, like many of his fellow political travellers, chooses not to tweet such information. Jum prefers the warm comfort of his hatred.

Who do you think you are, Peter Lawell? Thinking about it, Peter would have demanded six home games.

BBC Ceefax this evening, 2nd of October’20, the report on the Europa Cup group stage draw held at noon on the day, : “FA Cup winners, Arsenal will face league of Ireland side, Dundalk, Rapid Vienna and Molde in Group B of the 2020-22 Europa League. Tottenham have been drawn alongside a Bulgarian champions Ludogorets, LASK and a Royal Antwerp in group J. Leicester City will face Braga, AEK Anthens and Ukrainian side Zoroaster Luhansk in Group G. Scottish champions Celtic face a tough task in Group H as they take on AC Milan,Lille and Sparta Prague”. Any Gersnetters spot the obvious omission? Three English sides, the Scottish Establishment club, and League of Ireland pub team; all mentioned, but one club deliberated omitted. Plus ca change.

The State of the Nation. I have waited since Saturday to see if any fall out evolved from a couple of broadcasting points. I suspect collective discipline has been restored, temporarily? We know the Scottish Government’s Clinical Director, Jason Leitch has been regularly appearing on BBC Radio Scotland’s ‘Off the Ball’. I think it’s quite an astute move, allowing Leitch and his message to reach a differing audience and demographic. Despite DrStu’s constant attempts at politicising the weekly 45 minute slot, I think Leitch has mostly played with a straight bat? Anyways, on Saturday, just after Leitch’ s contribution; Cosgrove went into a minor rant. He felt general discipline in the country was beginning to break down, and folks were mistaken if they thought the end of Covid was in sight. Then, he got after some PQ colleagues, “people I work with, people who’s views I respect and admire, someone I agree with politically, are spouting views not helpful to the country’s wellbeing”. Off the Ball finished at 2 O’Clock, and Sportsound began. Big Dick introduced Michael Stewart, Tom English, and Billy Dodds. Sellik TV’s Ginga Ninja was revealed as the show’s VAR expert. Mikey launched into an appeal for crowds to be back at football in Scotland, as usual he did not understand the risk of folks viewing the beautiful game in the open air? Billy Dodds agreed, and Big Dick thought it was a decent argument. I realised what DrStu’ was getting at, Stewart’s line was straight from Peter’s mouth. It’s a bit of a give a way, Cosgrove revealing he knew what Stewart was going to say, an hour before it occurred. Last weekend, Cosgrove specifically questioned Leitch on Lennon’s plea that week for the return of crowds. The Lugan Bigot cited Kansas City playing in front of 18,000 the evening before. Leitch shot both the point and Lennon down, “ah don’t think referencing the USA in this current pandemic, is a good reference”. The Yahoos have been consistent on this drive, for whatever reason, they are determined to be allowed to host an attendance. We can speculate on sponsorship, corporate, or redundant disco lighting being the motive? The Michael Stewart aspect is not surprising, I have been told by a decent source that ra Sellik were attempting to get Stewart placed on the Sky Sport staff, over the last couple of years. Indeed, his James Traynor rant was deliberate, burning his bridges before moving on. Sky did not bite, and after several weeks in the wilderness, he signed up for Sellik TV and came back to a position of prominence on BBC Scotland. It’s only ten- twelve weeks past that Michael was telling us how valuable an asset Neil Doncaster, Shifty McGifty, and Rod the Fraud were to Scottish football. Maybe, some of the a Gang Hut could remind Mikey that those three cost Scottish football in excess of three-quarters of a million quid per annum. Surely, they should be persuading government of the Scottish football case, and they could find a national and league sponsor while they are at it, and we know, they’re at it. It’s time for PQ to decide what’s most important, what Peter wants, or the National Health? Michael has made his decision, Cosgrove is telling us so.

Rangers 2 Galatasaray 1 FGS : Morelos.

The Laird of Dunlop, the big cheese; well, he smells like a big over ripe cheese, Graham Spiers continues to push the most attractive podcast on the block. This week, it’s a call back for Rangers hater, Gordon Waddell, and an introduction to BBC Scotland staffer, Stefan Bienkowski. I am sure Graham is just giving the lad a reach around? Stefan ran a Sellik on line ‘zine before entering the hallowed halls of PQ. He is the barking mad clown that penned a piece last November, demanding the postponement of the then, just announced General Election. Stefan’s mindset was his beloved Sellik were playing Cluj in Romania, their last Europa Cup group match in the middle of December. This coincided with the date of the election. Stefan argued at least 15,000 Yahoos would be out of the country watching ra hoops. Seriously, the missing hordes would corrupt the election result? Less than 700 Yahoos traveled, and the country survived the crisis. Stefan and Graham are made for each other, a rhapsody In corduroy.

Sellik TV’s Michael Stewart has taken to Twitter this evening, he is raging that BBC Radio Scotland had former Referee, Hugh Dallas on at 6 O’Clock to tell the listeners, both a Rangers penalties were legitimate under the laws of the game. Further, Michael is demanding his view be countered, and wondering why BBC Scotland have allowed Dallas to speak unfettered? I suspect PQ has suffered a stroke of balance, don’t worry it won’t last any longer than tomorrow night. Still, Michael will be happier knowing RAB(rancid auld bigot) Kevin’s on Radio Snyde agrees with Sellik TV’s Ginga Ninja, both Rangers’ awards were not penalties, and Motherwell were denied two stonewallers. Keeping good company there, Mike?

Just for the record, I note Sellik TV’s, Michael Stewart took to Sportscene last evening to tell viewers, both Rangers penalties awarded at Fir Park yesterday afternoon, were NOT penalties. Further, Motherwell were denied a stonewalled and both Aberdeen penalties at Dingwall were wholly justified. We wait eleven months and 27 games to be awarded a penalty and the Ref’ got it wrong. When will Rangers catch a break? It’s big Chris Iwelumo I feel sorry for, the vengeance of Michael will be swift and thorough. Big Chris did not agree with Michael being “sick and tired” of Steven Gerrard defending his player, Morelos after Ryan Edwards assault. Chris said it was a straight red and Gerrard must defend his player. Last night, Michael had Shaun Maloney riding shotgun, and he agreed fully with Mikey. Michael is PQ’s Witch Finder General, and he will not be denied. Steven Gerrard has been cited by Claire Whyte for defending a player with a puncture wound, in an incident where the referee, Kevin Clancy refused to even award a free kick.

An old mucked of Gersnet pitched up on BBC Scotland last evening, on the Nine. The President of the NUS(Scotland), Matt Crilly ironically stated, “undergraduates are paying for a service they don’t receive”. Now, we’ve had John Swinney and Nicola Sturgeon offering mixed messages to Scotland’s undergraduates this last week. First, it was a case of any undergraduate in residence was not allowed to visit the parental home, against the law said Nippy. Being populist and noting parents were arriving in cars at the doors of Uni’ residences, and removing their little darlings; Nicola and John decided such actions were not against the lockdown laws, and it’s okay to go home for Christmas too. Crilly on BBC Scotland, highlighting the injustice of students being charged for accommodation they won’t be using, must surely tug at a heartstring? Every Rangers supporter does similarly, we pay our BBC license fee and receive no service. I am positive Matt can be trusted to pursue our injustice along side the one being experienced by his members? Given Holicom no longer hold ra Sellik account, anyone know who has taken over ra push for ten?

Today was a hard one to take for the Gang Hut, a 1-5 victory for Rangers at Fir Park has to wear a PQ perspective. One half of the Blarney Bhoys, Tom English vented frustration at Half time, “Rangers are the beneficiaries of two soft penalties, whereas Motherwell have been denied a stonewalled when Kamala pushed Campbell. Look, Roy Hogson summed it up last night, the hand ball must be deliberate”. Before the game at Fir Park, Tom was predicting, “a tricky afternoon for Rangers”. Now, Big Dick is the Gang Hut statto, he has the Bumper Big Book of all penalties awarded and conceded. Big Dick is posted missing today and fellow Dandy, Liam McLeod commentating was not forth coming. Thus, listen in Gang Hutters, Rangers last penalty awarded on league business was during October of last year. It’s eleven months and 27 matches since our last spot kick in the Premiership. Every other club in the Premiership has been awarded a penalty during that period, the vast majority several. The law of averages does not pertain to Rangers at PQ, Tom made an ill considered decision, knowing there was a waiting grateful audience. At half time, he tweeted on the BBC Scotland account, “can Bobby Madden complete his hat trick, missed a couple of opportunities in the first half”. Manner from heaven for current Motherwell Director, Andrew Wilson, he replied, “Farcical decisions by Bobby Madden, two pens to Rangers, neither strong but second just ludicrous. 2 clear pens denied to us, was ever thus”. Andrew’s bitterness could not be contained, he took it further, “Madden has been the most dangerous player on the field for Motherwell to cope with, and good in defence also”. This is Wilson’s second stint as a Director of the claret and amber, he gave up before to become an MSP for the SNP. He was responsible for the Scottish Government’s economic case for independence, 635 pages predicated upon a barrel of oil being $115. Apparently, Wilson has an Economics degree? I am sure the Compliance Officer will use it for necessary mitigation. Maybe, it’s where Gerrard has gone wrong, being cited for defending his own player with a puncture wound after referee, Kevin Clancy did not even award a free kick. Tonight’s Sportscene will have Sellik TV’s Michael Stewart ignoring Andrew Wilson completely, whilst demanding referees’ leniency towards Rangers players end immediately, or Peter will wield the big stick.

Motherwell 1 Rangers 3 FGS : Morelos.

Just to round off PQ’s lamentable performance from last evening, and to reinforce DMAA’s observation. Towards the end of the show, Big Dick engaged Billy Dodds(designated to sit on the naughty step and watch Rangers TV) to discuss the evening’s results. Billy, who no longer considers himself to be a Rangers supporter began, “Rangers cruised eventually, Willem had their chances, like Aberdeen”. Then, he goes on for a minute about instances that occurred during the Sporting - Aberdeen match. Obviously, despite being tasked to watch and report on the Gers game for the elderly, the infirm, those in remote areas, .......... those paying their license fee; clearly he preferred to watch the Dandies. There will be no coverage next Thursday against Galatasaray either, the game’s at Ibrox. Seriously, why can’t they dedicate someone willing to do the a Rangers beat and let them provide the SERVICE. In five years PQ have put several freelancers on that particular step, beginning with Craig Paterson, Richard Wilson, Chick Young, Derek Ferguson, ...... etc. They have either left the BBC or worked their way out of the particular job. Obviously, it’s considered a job with no future? We have talked of precedents within the BBC, they sent other reporters to Old Trafford to deal with Sir Awex’s several year silence, they sent other reporters to Dens when Jum Spence was banned(not withdrawal of press privilege) twice, they have ....... etc. They are deliberately discriminating against a section of their fully paid-up audience, and they revel in it. Truly, a Gang Hut culture.

Absolutely, it’s five years since McLaughlin’s ridiculous performance at the immediate end of Warburton’s first match, a Rangers 2-6 win at Easter Road. Remember, Chris began his match report with, “four Rangers supporters have been arrested for alleged sectarian chanting”. He was engaged on social media a couple of hours later and claimed he had checked with the Match Commander, and claimed he always did so. Imagine our surprise when four weeks later, McLaughlin’s favourites were playing at Pittodrie and the usual IRA karaoke ensued. Again on social media, he made for sectarian chanting. Again, engaged on social media he claimed no arrests for sectarian chanting had occurred, and again referenced this with checking with the Match Commander. Truly, it was a shock to pick up the Aberdeen Press and Journal the next day, to find six of McLaughlin’s fellow Yahoos had been charged with sectarian chanting. Elderly, infirm,and lonely Rangers supporters pay the penalty for McLaughlin’s vanity.

Sportsound on BBC Radio Scotland is an Abertic Production. Tonight, four Scottish clubs participate in the Europa Cup qualifiers. Sportsound is providing live commentary on ra Sellik game in Riga, and further live commentary on Aberdeen’s visit to Lisbon. Motherwell in Israel and Rangers visit to Holland are reduced to updates. Aberdeen have played two Europa Cup games so far, at home to a Faroe Isles club, and away To Viking in Norway. Both games received live commentary. Ra Sellik have played two games also, a defeat of the Icelanders at home, and a humiliation at the hands of Ferencvaros in the CL qualifier at ra Stade de Gadd. Again, both games covered live by the Blarney Bhoys. By tonight all three games played by both Aberdeen and ra Sellik(six in total) all covered by live commentary. Motherwell’ two games against Northern Ireland Opposition were covered live,I suspect their third game in Israel is too far, and the PQ Palestine Solidarity Action will have been pushing boycott? Rangers one match in Gibraltar amounted to Al Lamont watching Rangers TV and a two minute report. It will be the same this evening, unless Willem win. BBC Scotland, run for Aberdeen and RaSellik supporters by Aberdeen and Sellik supporters.

Willem 1 Rangers 2 FGS : Morelos.

Sportscene did not show it, therefore did not discuss it.

Ah, the days of soup in a basket? At Uni’, forty-odd years past, I was a regular in a now long gone great wee boozer, ‘the Dunrobin’. Situated right across George Street from Strathclyde University. During the Argentine World Cup in 1978, you had to purchase a ticket for Scotland’s three group games against Peru, Iran, and Holland. The Patron was Big Tam, he had done robbing; he promised both types of food for all the games. Indeed, there was a choice for all three games, either a pie and peas(hot pea special- dried marrow fat peas marinated in malt vinegar) or a pie and beans. If pubs had persisted in providing such culinary triumphs, then there would be no need to visit the Traiteur.

........ and the choreography begins, Cosgrove will once again be dining in Gamba with Neil Doncaster. The Menus will be presented with the Peter script. Michael will be sick and tired of a certain club’s casual disregard for the future health of the nation. PQ’s Chris McLaughlin will do a piece to camera outside the Louden, Spiers will eat the boiled ham raw, and Jum Spence will show his strong suit. The real surprise here is Aidan Smith being handed the print responsibility, that’s usually the Daily Mail’s Stephen McGowan’s gig. Kevin’s started the ball rolling on Sunday.

Spiers come on for the Podcast appeals to the Yahoo sensitivity, it’s the seduction of the Hag’. Entitled, ‘an Anatomy of Celtic’ - the history, the culture, the fans, the songs, Neil Lennon, Celtic and Ireland. Angela is quoted, “I spoke for an hour, I could have easily carried on talking for the week”. Of course, Angela speaks through a hole in her balaclava.

Talking about being ready for the fray, steak and gravy pie by Fray Bentos is most apt. Lots of flaky pastry with very little steak and gravy. The just about sums up Spiers.

Ra Bhoy in Corduroy is really pulling out all the stops to attract Rangers supporters to his new podcast, ‘Pressbox’. His first broadcast had Kevin McKenna, Jum Spence, and a Gordon Waddell as guests. The second promoted Michael Stewart as his exclusive guest. The third is boasting Angela Haggerty and Harry Brady (administers the Celtic Underground website). Next, as guests, it will be the guys sitting either side of him at ra Stade ra Gadd.

“Hibs have been nasty, aggressive, in Rangers’ faces”, says Andy Walker at half time. Given Hanson’s fore arm smash into Hagi’s face and Drey Wright’s deliberate stamp on Kent’s standing foot; I am surprised the Ref’ did not book Morelos for scoring?