26th of foot

Ra Yahoos will get exactly what BIG Peter tells Neil to give them.

I suspect the Hill O'Dung awaits on opening day?

Yeah, We all know Chris is a classy guy. The word is the affair was largely conducted by car. After training, down the Dalmarnock Clydeside and I was told by a then senior Police Officer, occasionally in a southside graveyard. Chris was the face of Spook Erection.

When this spat was first aired, I remember Michael Stewart utilising BBC Scotland to put the Doncaster - MacLennan case. He ended the piece by saying, "Neil Doncaster and Murdoch MacLennan, these are the good guys". He should be reminded.

Sutton should be referred to as, 'the Molester of ra Sellik View Cub Reporter'.

Eddie Turnbull was a fantastic Gaffer, his Tornadoes side at the Hibees was a must see. A solid back four of Brownlie, Black, Blackley and, Schaedler. The midfield three of Stanton, Gardner and, O'Rourke had it all. Wide on either flanks were Duncan and Cropley, lots of pace. The two regulars that could have been replaced for better were the Keeper and, Alan Gordon. The player Eddie(former Royal Navy Chief Petty Officer)Turnbull told, "you are unfortunate son as all your brains are in your heid" was Tony Higgins. After Hibs, he spent several years at Thistle before taking up the reigns at the Players' Union.

Rangers have to turn a huge spotlight upon Murdoch MacLennan. Aka Shifty McGifty, long term dealings with Dermot Desmond - he is/was Chair of Dublin based Independent News and Media, a company owned by Desmond. MacLennan and Doncasters positions at the SPFL have been untenable for a long time. We have to thank RAB Cosgrove at his garrulous best for giving us an insight into the depth of hatred. RAB always likes folks to know he was on the inside of decisions; he told of Murdoch MacLennan's chauffeured car picking him up each day and giving him a lift back to his gaff in the Elephant and Castle. According to RAB, this went on for three years, Murdoch(then a high heid yin at the Telegraph) and he(then a working Journo at the NME) would talk Scottish football on the 30 minute journey home. Four-five years past a giggling guest inquired what word both RAB and MacLennan used when discussing Rangers and Rangers supporters on these journeys? RAB did NOT answer and has NEVER referred to these car conversations again.

Karim has gone from blowing bubbles to flying kites.

Where does Tam the Token turn next? It would appear a line by Tom English in a preparation for Brendan's return has had ra Sellik issuing banning orders. Apparently, Tom referred to, "the shameless one". An even bigger Sellik man suffered the same fate yesterday, Peter(McGuire)Martin of PLZ Soccer was NOT allowed entry either. Again, in the period of speculation before appointment, Peter Martin wrote, "Some people have short memories. Player revolt, tedious football, European humiliation and, a man declaring his love whilst working his ticket out of the club". The one time self-styled, 'Biggest Tim in Newarthill' sets up his own Sellik fanzine, fills it with fellow Yahoos and, uses every broadcast minute as a Sellik celebration; Big Peter L says NO? Back in his Radio Snyde days, Peter Martin took over from former Sellik PRO, Paul Cooney. During Gordon Strachan's tenure he became most encouraged with his team's progression to the CL knock-out stages. Similarly, with Lennon in his first spell. He pleaded with the Board to release the necessary funds to make ra Sellik a player on the BIG stage. It was a masturbatory exercise - you know world wide support, a passion unsurpassed, the electricity of ra Stade de Gadd, .......... etc. Peter was becoming a pest. Big P summoned Peter and administered the necessary punishment. Radio Snyde were denied commentary at the next home Euro evening. Peter Martin had to sit upon a comfy cushion in the Snyde studios with James Grady, drinking wine watching their heroes on telly being filleted at the Stydome by AC Milan and Barca' on both occasions. The message from BIG P is clear, there will be NO deviation from the given brief. Peter Martin and Tom English are a couple of House Paddies, they will bitch and moan to fellow Yahoos but ultimately do what is required to get on BIG P's good side. PQ is already suggesting a sycophantic apology and an offer of compensation. Tam the Token works for both BBC Scotland and PLZ Soccer, what does he do if his fellow Journos decide to boycott Sellik Park in a show of solidarity with yesterday's unjust treatment by ra Sellik? Remember Tam, there are the school fees, the big hoose in Jordanhill, the various Bookie accounts and, the school fees. A wee reminder at this point - Rangers did not ban Chris McLaughlin, he had his press privileges withdrawn after numerous warnings. Fellow Journos at BBC Scotland decided to boycott Ibrox in sympathy and for the next five years, Rangers supporters paying their license fees received next to no coverage of their club.

"BBC Scotland has asked Celtic to comment on the decision to deny the BBC access to the media conference and is waiting a response". It is baking hot today in southern Portugal, the mercury rises and the Government have issued a yellow health warning. I was thinking, the only way the ante can be raised is if Nicola and Peter made a break for their nearby holiday villa in their luxurious motorhome. However, it would appear events back home have caused a media stir? I received a text an hour or so past from an old mate who does private camera work in the sports journalism field. He was setting up at ra Stade de Gadd when the scuttlebutt broke reference BBC Scotland. it is standing room only and sharp inhalation whilst standing upon ones' tiptoes for the re-presentation of tombstone teeth, Brendan Rodgers as newly appointed Sellik Gaffer. Why has Peter banned the uber faithful? Chris, Tom, Pat, Kheredine, Amy, Connie, ................... etc are all in a right two and eight. The never faulted, not once on Ange's dismembered member and they were all ready and waiting for full throated consummation of Bren's Brie. What is the problem, the merest hint of a glow in Bren's shuch and there will be a dozen PQ tongues willing to do the needful. Amy Canavan is beside herself, she is sorry they cannot bring every Celtic beat and assures her listeners that PQ are doing everything in an effort to resolve the situation.

I saw Ham and Egg play in goals for Rangers. I saw him play centre forward for Rangers, an entire second half against Hearts at Ibrox when we were already 0-2 down. He scored but could not secure the equaliser. I saw him play right wing for a half hour at Fir Park in the days of one substitution, still bawling whilst hobbling. I saw him play right across the midfield in the two dozen games or more where he man marked Jimmy Johnstone. He knocked me off the enclosure wall in 1966 whilst playing Dortmund. A Greig clearance hit my nine year old napper. I hold no grudges and remember very little of the game. When he took the Manager's Office, his first season was a revelation for the Rangers support. We knocked out both Juventus and PSV in the European Cup, playing Sandy Jardine as Sweeper. Sandy swept both in front and back of the back four. He was Sammer before Sammer. An injury ravaged Rangers and an appalling winter did for us in the quarters against Cologne and, the mercurial Littbarski had a say too. I remember Brian Clough after having defeated Malmo in the final thanking Rangers and John Greig for doing the majority of the heavy lifting. He is most worthy of his award.

Shifting the Goal Posts. Touring around coastal Galicia is quite the thing, you arrive at another near deserted bay to find a shack willing to provide a Board of Pulpo and a large glass of the local Albarino for 10 Euros. I was on the southern side of Baiona two days past and found a Hotel Glasgow, three star spa by the Atlantic edge. Now, their Pulpo is served on a wooden Board accompanied with thickly sliced tattie. A generous dousing of Piementos Pecantes, then quickly baked in a woodfire oven. The acidity of the Albarino is the very dab. This week's PQ mutterings are brought to us by Podcast, thus a heavily Edited statement of intent. The acidity in Off the Ball is a product of it's terroir. Pat Nevin was first up on Saturday, he has a book to punt. Both broadcast and print media have been accommodating Pat for nearly a month. It is a follow up to his first tome and Pat hints at a trilogy. We know Pat is a literary addict and a Muso' because, he keeps telling us so. Ten days ago in the Guardian, Pat was telling all about life with an adult son, Simon who has autism. Now, given RAB Cosgrove's lad, Jack endures the same condition; you think a highlighting of the condition will ensue. No. Pat is a long term big wheel at Chelsea, thus an insight into Michael Beale? No again. How about something current like Pat's time at Celtic Boys' Club and, that interview he gave to BBC Scotland last November and still not broadcast? Still no. Pat regaled us with tales of the Fir Park sixteen yard box, a Fir Park crossbar that was four inches closer to the ground on one side and, John Boyle was way-out whacky. The best bit was saved for last, his one year tenure at Rugby Park. Pat claimed it his happiest year in football. As the close season arrived a young Killie player(no names, no pack drill) approached and after telling of his impression at Pat's conduct with his fellow Youths, he asked Pat and his wife to attend his wedding? He told of it being held at the family home, a reception mainly in the garden. Pat told of his honour at the invite and then his ghast was flabbered as the lad said, "will you stay in the garden throughout, ma Da doesn't like catholics in the house". Token Tam cut across saying, "ah, Pat ends with a tale from Scotland's past". Pat replied, "the past"? Sunday had the return of RAB's near Dennistoun neighbour, Susie McCabe. If you care to look back, Susie is no stranger to similar stories of the Pat ilk. Further, she likes to beat the drum for Nicola and Nationalism. Not on Sunday, I suspect the drum remains locked up in the Murrel Motorhome? Susie was the foil to RAB's slashing sabre. RAB raised the Hootsmon piece penned by The View from the Terrace regular, Joel Sked. This is a first, RAB sees the Terrace lads as competition and, in his 71st year does not like sharing Auntie Beeb's meagre rewards. However, Sked had given all Scottish Premiership sides a mark out of ten for their season and RAB liked it. Sellik scored nine out of ten, the only downside being Europe and, Susie was quick to agree after, "all the trophies are in our cabinet". Aberdeen scored eight out of ten; yep they secured third on the basis of a seven match winning run but, were knocked out of the Scottish Cup by a team from the sixth teir of the game, Darvel. You might see the flaws appearing? Herts and Hibs were both fives, St Johnstone was a four and, RAB went on at length agreeing with the mark. RAB ended with, "Dundee United received one from ten whereas Rangers were awarded three". No discussion, just quiet sniggers all round. Last season, Rangers achieved something no other Scots club has achieved in twenty years, qualification for the Champions League group stages. Played four games against more than decent opposition, Union St Gillois and PSV. We won through by defeating USG 3-0 and PSV 0-1 away in Eindhoven. We added most to the Scottish Euro coefficient for the fourth season running. Sellik go straight into the CL groups because of points secured by Rangers(Susie did not mention that), Joel Sked's own darlings, the Hearts made group stage in the Conference groups because of Rangers points(Joel did not mention that) and, RAB's beloved Scottish football sits ninth in the Euro rankings largely because of Rangers. He could not tell you who we played and defeated these last five years because like the rest of PQ - the achievements were deliberately ignored because of BBC Scotland's feud with Rangers. When Pedro stood in the Luxembourg shrubbery, everyone of those bastards were quick to lament the effect on the national coefficient. They have shifted the goal posts on that but, Joel Sked has learned a lesson at the knees of RAB - stick it on the H-u-ns and you will be subject to greater amplification. .

Thus, we have the Fan Engagement Department(FEDs) and the Fan Advisory Board(FAB). Asking for a friend, John Edgar Hoover - are the FEDs FAB about attending games whilst cross dressing?

It has been a hard week to be a Jags fan. Heart achingly eliminated from the Premiership play offs against Ross County. The had established a 3-zip lead in Dingwall and, conceded late goals, the equaliser in the 93rd minute. Extra time and penalties ensued, the Harry Wraggs lost out 5-4 from the spot. The feel good factor was the sell out crowds at Firhill for the visits of Queens Park, Ayr United and, Ross County, monies had been earned? Two days later, the published accounts show a big financial hole, in excess of half a million pounds. In fact, the accounts revealed the Jags share of a Scottish Cup tie at sell out Ibrox allowed the Maryjill club to pay all staff wages until the end of the season. Alan Nixon finds the truth hard to swallow swallow thus, writes sh1te about Sevco to feel better.

Or, Tommy Hutchison?

Players opening pubs and hotels has been an ever present. Certainly, Novo allowed his name to front a pub. I believe towards the end of his tenure in the License trade, Jim Baxter was following suit? King Kai, Fergie, DJ, ...................... all the way back to a couple of our founding players; all donned the Barman's apron.

The reaction of Glasgow City Council's Licensing Board will be interesting. Will the Gerry Braiden inspired Ibrox and Cessnock Residents Associations be motivated to raise objections?

I believe the - 'Sands 8(ate) 0(nothing) is always available to placate the niche market?

As Hall and Oates sang - he's gone, it will be a devil to replace him - Peter the Pointer Grant. Please.

The Bay of Biscay. Currently aboard a Brittany Ferry without the necessary needs of marine navigation ie cardboard funnels and painted on windows. My destination is Santander and, then a month's hurl around the Iberian peninsula. The seas is slate grey, much like the skly and tonight's conditions are predicted to be on the rough side, Bootneck conditions. Traveling down to Portsmouth on Saturday, PQ CSC navigated the guid ship, Sellik through the calmest of waters. Hands on the tiller began with Angela Haggerty on Saturday morning with Shereen Nanjiani. Then, Off the Ball had Sellik State of Mind Editor, Paul John Dykes on again. Paul John needed a ticket for the Cup final and RAB and Tam the Token facilitated the shout-out for two hours. RAB trooled Kenny Mac again, claiming he was unavailable for broadcast due to connectivity problems with the Bristol Bar. How we laughed. Sportsound had the full roll call, Chris, Tom, Paddy, Peter Grant, Kheredine, ................. etc, don't rock the boat, Ange is a real Sellik man. Sunday morning, it was Connie McLaughlan for three hours, she told us, "Humza will be gutted if Ange goes". It is the one thing about PQ, we are continually told the Sellik state of mind.

Similarly, the latest MyGers package arrived this morning. The Goody box contained a pen, a lapel badge and, a wooden picture frame. Initially, the most useful goody is the metal drinks coaster. It has a gun metal depiction of the Rangers lion roaring. The picture frame has already been filled by a team picture of the club that has given me most joy this calendar year. Bodo Glimt from the Norwegian Arctic Circle handed Ange and Angeball their collective arse. 5-1 aggregate victory, including a 1-3 scudding at ra Stade de Gadd.

Here on Gersnet, we have replicated events of Autumn 1976. After the Treble winning season of 1975-'76, the Rangers support looked forward enormously to season 1976-'77. We had a temporary problem at centre back and Jock Wallace contacted his old Army buddy and Southampton Gaffer, Laurie McMenemy for a solution? The Saints had just won the FA Cup with a Scot at centre half, Jim Steele. Edinburgh born'n'bred, he had made his name at Dundee along side other wonderful names, Ian Philip, John Duncan, Jocky Scott, Gordon Wallace, ....... etc. We signed BIG Jim on loan for a month and, he played all six games. His English earned reputation as a real hard man of the game proceeded him. Remember, this was the English football of Chopper Harris and Jack Charlton. Jim was cautioned in everyone of those five games where we won one, drew four and, lost one. We went from Treble Champions to poor also rans. I was a member of two RSCs, one was reasonably near to home , Tannochside Loyal; the other was because attending University meant living in the west end, Partick Loyal. I attended both clubs end of season Player of the Year dance and the winner at both(and at least another dozen) was Jim Steele because he cared for the jersey, staunchly booked in every match - real commitment. Malik Tillman and Jim Steele, one of a kind. Those other names from that Dundee side, I loved John Duncan, went to Spurs and became top scorer. My pick was Ian Philip, he could play anywhere in defence. He had a season at Crystal Palace in the old First Division, played every game and won the Club's Player of the Year. He returned to Dundee after a season because of homesickness. I would have loved to have seen Ian in Rangers blue.

I suspect it is more likely to be Steve Clarke with the Lego chewer as his Assistant?

The Convenor of Glasgow City Council, Susan Aitken has arrived at the party. Her Policy Advisor, Gerry Braiden has removed the chains from the Meatloaf tribute act. Three days after events, Susan is in a grievous state of mind. Mass vandalism and outbreaks of violence in the city centre has raised her dander to a bat out of hell comment, "the actions of the supporters were beyond tolerable". I suspect Gerry gave her that line? Beyond tolerable - you took the words right out of my mouth. I know how it feels Susan. Remember, you got elected and took control of the Council. The very first thing was regeneration of the city centre, specifically Trongate and Saltmarket. You spent on average, £50,000 per retail unit on several dozen old Council owned shop spaces. Then, you had a lottery for the first dozen to receive a peppercorn rent of £1 per year for the next five years. The first name out of the hat was Gordon Archer, he wanted two units for an art exhibition space. Yep, that Gordon Archer, the one recently banned from running companies for six years because he transferred £400,000 from Lake District Biogas in the week before it went bankrupt. You know Gordon, the Hibs season ticket holder? It's beyond believable, Gordon is your husband. Get the band back into the studio and record, 'Beyond Tolerable'. Oh and Susan, you don't have to snort every line Gerry feeds you - two out of three ain't bad.

The Nationalist website, 'Bella Caledonia' is providing proof that control over the narrative is being contested. It has rushed this evening to reinforce the 2016 mantra, 'Hibs fans entered the Hampden pitch to celebrate, the Rangers supporters came on to fight'. We can see the comfort being derived because Bella Caledonia is under the iron fist of deranged Hibee bigot, Mike Small. Tonight, Mike is adamant that false equivalence abounds, "Celtic fans were celebrating at the Tron whereas Rangers fans were attacking the Police and fighting each other all over Glasgow in 2021". Of course, Mike Small deliberately fail fails to make mention of the pro-Palestinian demonstration that took place in George Square, the day before Rangers clinched the title. Mike was in attendance at George Square that day, during lockdown. I wonder if Mike trampled any flower beds in the square that day or, climbed upon any of the benches? Mike believes CalMac Ferries are better equipped with painted on windows and cardboard funnels. Controversially, Mike thinks Nicola's boaby is better tasting than Humza's.