Mick and Chick were Sick.
Yesterday was a high day and a holiday for the PQ Gang Hut, Aberdeen hosting ra Sellik is cause for party hats, streamers and, balloons. It was just the regular old bags filled with hot air championing their preferred prejudices. Big Dick, Liam McLeod, Wullie Miller and, Billy Dodds all stood free whereas Pat Bonner furiously pumped air into Angeball. It was the full BBC Scotland production for a ninth v sixth game attracting an attendance at Pittodrie, ten thousand below capacity. The Dons match programme featured Wullie Miller's goals against Sellik, the Gang Hut wallow wallowed in the warm nostalgia.
First against second occurred at Ibrox an hour after the nostalgia had dissipated in Aberdeen, Sportsound closed down. Cosgrove and Cowan came on air and announced Chick Young would be, "across all happenings at Ibrox". The reality was Chick watching Rangers TV in a PQ studio and as expected from a Journo in his eighth decade, he began enthusiastically and slowly but surely deflated. Cosgrove enters his eighth decade next month and as the afternoon progressed, he sounded burst. Before the puff escaped, enthusiasm greeted Kevin Nisbet's header back across McGregor and so it should, a well crafted goal for the Hibs.
Chick's next intervention belies his time as a Cub Reporter at the Rangers News. Remember Chico, those tenets of accuracy and objectivity? Cosgrove interrupted Cowan, "Tam, there's been a red card at Ibrox. Over to Chick". We heard a hesitant wheeze then, "err um ah Porteous has been red carded for a challenge on Aribo". Obviously, Rangers TV was not sufficiently efficient at putting up necessary replays because Cosgrove and Cowan returned to discussing Third Lanark's last scorer. Chick rediscovered his positivity at half-time, "it's the Alamo at Ibrox but Rangers have not created a clear cut opportunity".
The national broadcaster played Elgar's Nimrod for the duration of the second half. Chick made a further three interventions, his announcements on the Alamo casualty figures were not welcome. Jack Ross might be the next Sellik manager but that is at least a few months away. His immediate aspirations as a title winning boss is just another PQ burst balloon. However another Beeb bite at the cherry remained, Sportscene was to air at 19.15 hours. How would Producer, Eamonn Donohoe interpret events at Ibrox?
Increasingly, Eamonn has come to realise that Michael Stewart's presence on a PQ settee is as sound as Ryan Porteous being named in a Hibs' back four whilst facing Rangers. It's the rush of blood to the head that sees Michael and Cosgrove supporting Irvine Welch's right to free speech. Calling Morelos, "a sticky bun" and stating his existence is best served by exercising a machete epitomises new, modern Scotland. Blame the H-u-ns for everything. Last night's sofa riders were James McFadden and Richard Foster and they agreed, Porteous was a deserved recipient of his marching orders.
Michael had to resort to Twitter to broadcast his view, "Understandably Rangers will say it's dangerous from Porteous and they may have a point, but for me he doesn't make catch Aribo and I don't think it deserves a red card". Alfredo is both nefarious and pernicious and I suspect Michael contacted Eamonn prior to broadcast and reasoned Ryan was provoked? We saw a 10 second clip of Morelos pushing Porteous to the ground at the Broomloan corner flag a minute before Ryan got rash. Steven Thompson asked the panel, "has Morelos angered Ryan"? I loved Richard Foster's reply, "if he has it's good game smarts from Morelos".
You pays your License Fee and if Chick and Mick are sick, I'll take it.